If you're a high achiever who is always on, always anticipating what's next, and always saying
yes — this episode is for you.
In this solo episode, Dr. Sohee Jun gets real about burnout, people pleasing, and the one thing
most high achievers forget to factor in: the mental and emotional energy cost of everything they
say yes to. She reframes what boundaries actually are — not rigid rules that leave you feeling
guilty when you break them, but a flexible scaffolding for making decisions that honor your
priorities and protect your energy.
This one is practical, personal, and packed with tools you can start using today.
What You'll Learn in This Episode
● Why the popular conversation around "having boundaries" can actually be damaging —
and what to reframe it to
● How Dr. Sohee's own burnout taught her what she was missing every time she said yes
● Why mental and psychological load — not the doing of things — is the #1 depletion
factor for high achievers today
● Dr. Sohee's definition of healthy boundaries: the scaffolding for making decisions that is
flexible, realistic, and shame-free
● The 3-step framework for evaluating any new request before you commit
● Why establishing healthy boundaries means retraining the people around you — and
how to hold yourself through their reactions
● How to use Dr. Sohee's Self-Care Assessment Tool to identify exactly where you're most
depleted
Quotes From This Episode
"Healthy boundaries is about having the scaffolding to make decisions. It's not completely rigid
— it's flexible and realistic to maintain, and it doesn't leave you doing the walk of shame if you
didn't uphold it."
"For high achievers, mental and emotional energy is the cost. It's less about the doing of things
— it's the load. And it's the key aspect that high achievers do not factor in."
"When you establish healthy boundaries, you are retraining people on how to interact with you."
"Don't pick up their reaction. Hold yourself through it — and know that what you're doing is
building a muscle."
"This is the inner work that needs to happen for outer success."
Dr. Sohee's 3-Step Boundary Framework
When a new request comes in, pause and use this framework before responding:
Step 1 — Buy yourself time. Say "Let me get back to you" or "Let me think about it." This
short-circuits the automatic yes and gives you permission to pause.
Step 2 — Review against your current load. Look at your workload, family commitments,
caregiving responsibilities, and any other outside commitments. If your plate is already full —
that's a full stop no.
Step 3 — Ask: is this an aligned priority? If yes, commit — but ask yourself what you need to
drop to make room. If no, go back and say: "At this time I'm overcommitted. Thank you for
asking."
Free Resource Mentioned in This Episode
📥 Dr. Sohee's Self-Care Assessment Tool — one of her most downloaded resources. It
helps you identify the six areas where you're most depleted and offers specific ways to restore
each one. Download it here
Reflection Questions for You
1. What are the real reasons you keep saying yes — FOMO, scarcity mindset, people
pleasing, genuine interest? Name them.
2. When you said yes to something recently and regretted it, what did you forget to factor
in?
3. Where in your life are you most mentally and emotionally depleted right now?
4. Who in your life might "throw an adult tantrum" when you start establishing healthy
boundaries — and are you prepared for that?
5. What is one thing you can take off your calendar this week to restore yourself?
About Dr. Sohee Jun
Dr. Sohee Jun is the founder of "asian, like me..." — a podcast and community for the modern
Asian woman redefining what it means to thrive. A Korean immigrant, executive coach, author,
and entrepreneur, Sohee has spent over 20 years helping high-achieving women navigate
culture, career, and identity. She is also the founder of EVRten, a wellness brand for women
who are ever curious and growth focused.
Resources & Links
● Download Dr. Sohee's Self-Care Assessment Tool: https://bit.ly/drsohee_selfcare
● Connect with Dr. Sohee to explore 1:1 coaching: www.soheejunphd.com/coaching
● Connect with Dr. Sohee to explore speaking at your company or event:
https://soheejunphd.com/contact
● Explore Dr. Sohee's bestselling books: https://soheejunphd.com/books
● Explore Dr. Sohee's wellness products: www.evrten.com
● SUBSCRIBE to the podcast and don't miss a drop: https://soheejunphd.com/insights
Enjoyed This Episode?
● Share it with the high achiever in your life who can't stop saying yes
● Leave a review — it helps the community grow
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● Follow "asian, like me..." on your favorite podcast platform
This is your space to feel seen, heard, and inspired. Let's grow together.
Keywords & Tags
healthy boundaries, burnout prevention, high achievers, saying no, mental load, emotional load,
people pleasing, asian like me podcast, Dr. Sohee Jun, boundary framework, self-care, inner
work outer success, modern Asian woman, overachieving women, psychological load, sensory
overload, scarcity mindset, FOMO, aligned priorities, executive coaching, women's leadership,